A more succint version of Mr. Brands "The Guardian" article

I needed a link to this bit of writing, so I've posted it here. Feel free to read. I'll even include the link to the original article. But, I dont expect it to be pertanent to any of my typical themes on this blog. Good day to all!
sarah

Dear Mr. Brand,
This note is in response to your twitter:
“You might like to go to guardian.co.uk then go to football, and then read my article. Then you could teach me how to convey that info succinctly.”
To which I responded:
oldsoul991@rustyrockets I accept this challenge! I know little of football, I have heard of the Guardian, and I'm looking up succinctly now! By God yes!
I’ve taken the liberty of reducing your lovely piece of writing to a poor excuse for a primary school report. I hope this is put together succinctly enough for your needs.
Cordially,
Ms .S.C. Gallagher

Sir Alex Ferguson’s desires to win trophies for Manchester United, is all encompassing. Manchester United beat Liverpool, Chelsea, & Arsenal’s teams.
These questions are being posed amongst the football following & participating population: They may happen, but probably won’t-

“Ooooh, Wenger might go to Madrid”

“Tevez might go to Anfield”

The only sure thing is that Manchester United will win things. My mate is sad, roughly, they’re using cookie cutters forms to produce flawless players. He misses fat, toothless, hag men footballers. The kind not welcome in today leagues, lest they be taken out back and shot.

Now United has equaled Liverpool’s record of 18 titles. Fergie now says he’ll only be happy when they surpass that with 19 titles. Sir Alex Ferguson is old and getting older by the second. He is in declining health, i.e. he’s a sick old man. Fergie will likely continue to be a crabby, sick old man, yelling, even, from beyond the grade.

On a side note: Pre- Conception (?) Announcement: Please welcome help welcome to the Geldof family, Moon Cup Geldof. It will be born or hatched, sometime after 4pm NYC time on 23 May, 2009.

Will Tevez remain? Is it ok for United get caught up in millionaire slave trade but not West Ham? Tevez said publicly he’s leaving no matter what. This sounds fairly forthright for a footballer.
Perhaps we could we persuade you if we made him king of Manchester & forced Roodney to drive him. What if Falklands Islands are returned? How about we free from this weird contract you’re in, that makes you to wander the earth like The Hulk.

United’s final game is against Hull. The relegation threatened managers of the north-east are preparing their laments, should Hull somehow escape the championship by thrashing United’s reserves.

ACCEPT FOOTBALL HAS CHANGED! All the big people have little people.
Prediction: Ferguson will slurp triumphantly from a Moon Cup.
(Jesus, the things not even born yet and he are slurping out of it?)

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